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You know how many sigmas that was? Over 12 god-damn sigmas. I'd have a much better chance of guessing everyone's buttcoin private key, in a row, on the first try. That's how unlikely that is. A bailout for shitty funds and market makers like Trump's handjob buddy Kenny Griffin from Citadel. Why do you think Jamie Dimon had a heart attack in early March? He saw all the dogshit that everyone put on his books.

And every single TQQQ put expiration would have had to be paid. Tens or hundreds of billions on TQQQ puts alone.

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If they go through with this, this was probably the bottom. Just like I have no way of knowing when the Fed decides to do a bailout. But you react to that, when you see it. Do you think "Oh no world's ending" and go sell everything? No, dumbass, you try to figure out what Billy's doing.


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And in this case it was pretty obvious, Billy saw the Fed train coming and wanted to close his shorts. So you give the dude a hand, quick short in and out, and position for Billy dumping his short bags. So we made the decision to exit. So how could I catch that? Because it wasn't random, yo. And I'm here to teach your asses how to try to spot such potential moves. But first, the technical bootcamp.

You never FOMO into buying too fast. The play's never going to work if you do that, because you give the market maker free delta, and he's going to hedge that against you. If you all fomo in at once into the same strike, the market maker algos will just pull the asks higher.

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You just gave him free downside insurance, so of course he's going to start going long. And you just traded against yourself, congrats. Don't step on each other's toes. You put in an order, and you wait for it to fill for a couple of seconds. And you keep doing that a few times. Move your strikes, if needed.


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  • Only get a partial fill or don't get a fill at all? You cancel your bid. Don't fucking leave it hanging there, or you're going to put a floor on the price. Let the mm algos chill out and go again later. Algos are especially active at x, x, x, x, x and x Try not to buy at those times. RULE 3. Don't just roll with Robinhood, you're just gimping yourself. But for cheap faggy puts or calls , Robinhood is the best. If you want to make a play for which the other side would think "That's free money! Because Citadel will snag that free money shit like no other.

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    Seriously, if you don't have a RH account, open one. It's great for making meme plays. Doesn't matter how big or small your bankroll is. If you go all-in, you're just gambling, and the odds are stacked against you.

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    You need to have extra cash to manage your positions. Which leads to RULE 5. Good job!


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    And again. Snowball those gains. RULE 6A. This is not as valid for calls. Long explanation why, but the gist of it is this: you know how calls have unlimited upside while puts have limited upside?

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    RULE 6B. Do you close the position, take your loss porn and post it on wsb? Again and again. You don't manage losing positions by closing. That removes your gainz when the market turns around. You ever close a position, just to have it turn out it would have been a winner afterwards? Yeah, don't do that. You manage it by opening other positions. Got puts? Buy calls. Got calls?

    Buy puts. Turn positions into spreads. Buy spreads. Buy the VIX. Sell the VIX. They wanna pin for OPEX? Sell them options. Not enough bankroll to sell naked? Sell spreads. Make them fight you for your money, motherfuckers, don't just give it away for free. When you trade, YOU have the advantage of choosing when and where to engage.

    The market can only react. Starts losing?

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    You pound it. Unfortunately expired worthless but also goes to show I'm not selling you puts, dickwads Then the autists show up: "Hahaha you lost all your money nice job you fucking idiot why do you even live?